Sunday, April 30, 2023

A Reflection on Falling Out of Love with Myself

Five and half years ago, Hurricane Maria was destroying Puerto Rico. I was signing books. 

Yes, the very night that one of the worst hurricanes in recorded history was ravaging through my homeland, I was in North Carolina, at a fancy Barnes and Noble, reading chapter four of my second book, Drop The Stones, in a pretending-to-be-oh-so-holy voice.  

I had practiced the pauses to make the story more dramatic. I had rehearsed the pronunciation, so my English sounded better. And I was dressed to impressed (at least my wife was impressed). 

My mom and dad had flown into Raleigh to see me. My photo was about three feet high on the main bookstore entrance. Friends and “fans” had come to get their signed copy.  

Ugh. 

Listen, I love myself. Sometimes too much, sometimes not enough. The problem was that I was falling for the same traps that I kept telling people that they shouldn’t be falling in.  

Then a friend gave me a call three days after Maria made landfall. He was neither pleasant nor cute. He did not call to congratulate me on my book release. He did not call me to invite me to one of his conference events so that I could promote my book some more. He loved me yes … but he called me to tell me off.  Continue here....

-- Carlos Rodriguez


Maybe this is what the next generation is trying to say: