Isn’t this one of the great tensions (and lesson) of Holy Friday — sacrifice vs leverage?
As referenced in Matt 26:38, I've never noticed that Jesus said he was...overwhelmed. He was clearly suffering (and, this was before the events we now refer to as Good Friday).
You and I are suffering, too (note the suppression we almost instantly feel because we view ours and Jesus' through a lens of comparison). There are days when I feel overwhelmed; with a kind of sorrow in places within me that are hard to identify (my...soul?).
We are so accustomed to solving for the suffering in our lives, and to using power to do it — so much so that we are even willing to bargain for it.
And, yet, accepting suffering (our powerlessness) is really the only healthy way to orient ourselves to it. This is the way of sacrifice — something that we are often, at best, only intellectually used to. Practicing it is even more unusual.
And, Jesus calls us, just to that. To follow his example, of sacrifice.
When I was a kid, I couldn't understand why Jesus just let his own death happen, especially when he had to power to stop it. He had more power than those who were against him, but he wouldn't use it...the way they were using it against him. But, Jesus knew something I didn't (and still don't, much of the time).
We tend to view things through the lens of investment — what's in it for me? Will it work?
Jesus is saying it is not ROI that is good for us; sacrifice is what is good for us — it is what heals us, what makes us truly capable of making any difference in the world...by extending that same healing to others.
When we feel overwhelmed, leverage is often the only good option we can see. But, Jesus says to look at him, at his approach; to look at sacrifice — entrusting ourselves, rather than leveraging ourselves.
