Another lingering reflection, on a recent I'm Wondering...:
I'm wondering...about how people's lives are changed.
The thing is, in spite of what we'd like to think, we don’t really know how to change someone else’s life (maybe that's a good thing; after all, we're not God...). This is probably true because we mostly don’t understand very much about how lives are really changed in the first place. This is complicated a bit further because we often too quickly assume that what changed something significant in our own life would (or should!) do the same for someone else.
But, understanding the real dynamics of how such things work is critical.
My observation is that, more often than not, it isn’t information itself that changes someone. The context of the need and the particular moment that coincides with something meaningful generates the spark of change. In other words, it is highly contextualized and experiential. Information is involved, but often somewhat serendipitously (or, if one believes such things — which I do — providentially). It was already there, in most cases. But, when the context or the need changes, experience of that information can be completely different.
And, this, is rarely orchestratable by someone else. Sure, sometimes it is. People will often say an experience like military service really changed them. That can be orchestrated. There are other situations where circumstantial change is 'forced'. But, often the kind of change that really happens internally is when someone is ready to change — they need to because they want to.
Practically speaking, I'm thinking these are often among the catalysts for real change:
- INSPIRATION — exposure to something highly captivating to one's sense of being or purpose
- REVELATION — something is revealed that is different from prior working assumptions
- PAIN — it's too painful not to make a change
