Prevention Is What Matters

In the last decade or so mounting research has shown how lifestyle changes, including exercise, stress management, and diet can prevent almost ninety percent (90%) of chronic illnesses in our society.

Meditation, restful sleep, healthy diet, emotional and social well-being, exercise, breathing techniques, and healthy relationships can change disease-related gene expression, which in turn can dynamically change how we experience health or disease.

-- Deepak Chopra

Tumbleweeds or Watered Trees

This is what the Lord says:

“Cursed is the one who trusts in man,
  who draws strength from mere flesh
  and whose heart turns away from the Lord.
That person will be like a bush in the wastelands;
  they will not see prosperity when it comes.
They will dwell in the parched places of the desert,
  in a salt land where no one lives.

“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord,
  whose confidence is in him.
They will be like a tree planted by the water
  that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
  its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought.

-- Jeremiah 17:5-8

What do I want to be? A tumbleweed blowing around where no one else lives or a nourished and strong tree offering life to my surroundings?  The answer (result) is in where I place my trust (confidence).

Happy!

This one makes me feel about as good as this one did!

The anxiety of unplugging and why we should disconnect to connect

I recently read The Big Disconnect: Protecting Childhood and Family Relationships in the Digital Age by clinical psychologist Catherine Steiner-Adair with Teresa H. Barker and was horrified by how much I saw of myself and my family and friends in the authors' case studies. Steiner-Adair is a clinical instructor in the Department of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and an associate psychologist at McLean Hospital. I reached out to Steiner-Adair because I wanted to better understand how to take control of our technology instead of letting it control us. The conversation was good timing for me as Reboot’s National Day of Unplugging begins this Friday night and I'm the spokesperson. But this was the chance for me to listen to someone else urging us to pause and consider the benefits and risks of technology. Read the interview here....

-- Tanya Schevitz, spokesperson for Reboot's National Day of Unplugging

Presence matters....

Expert

I don't believe in innate talent. You have to work with perseverance to become an expert in any discipline.

-- Ben Heine

Perseverance

In the realm of ideas, everything depends on enthusiasm; in the real world, all rests on perseverance.

-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Forgiveness - Eva Kor

A powerful story about something even more powerful than you can imagine -- forgiveness.

The U.S. Economy: Kidding Ourselves

Small business is dying in this country, and this will have catastrophic consequences for our economy and way of life. Up to 50% of all jobs are in small businesses and approximately 65% of all new good jobs are created by them, according to the Small Business Administration. Without startups and growing small businesses, nothing will fix America’s economic energy, let alone create new good jobs.

Let me put it this way: If the unemployment rate is really going down, then why did the issue become the new No. 1 problem facing Americans today? And why did Federal Reserve Chair Janet Yellen, in her first congressional testimony this month, say, “Those out of a job for more than six months continue to make up an unusually large fraction of the unemployed, and the number of people who are working part time but would prefer a full-time job remains very high”? She also said, “…the recovery in the labor market is far from complete. The unemployment rate is still well above levels that Federal Open Market Committee participants estimate is consistent with maximum sustainable employment.”

Americans aren’t looking for part-time, crappy jobs, and they aren’t looking for more free time to paint or read. They want the respect and dignity of a full-time, good job. The problem is, U.S. adults with full-time jobs as a percentage of the U.S. adult population right now is 42% -- the lowest monthly average since Gallup started our Payroll to Population (P2P) metric in March of 2011.

-- Jim Clifton

Continue reading....

Freedom As An Opportunity

For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.

-- Galatians 5:13

Jump Shot

Welcome to March Madness!  A great story about the history of the 'jump shot', the quality of the man behind it, and what is really important in life.

How to Cope with What the Internet Does to Your Brain

Just as the hammer has extended our hands, the Internet extends the reach of our brains. When used efficiently as a tool, far from hurting us, technology makes us smarter. However, if the web’s distractions sometimes make your head hurt, you’re not alone. The brain performs optimally when focusing on one task rather than switching back and forth between multiple tasks. Some evidence suggests that it becomes more difficult for people to focus when they are accustomed to multitasking. Even if you don’t intend to multitask, the web’s numerous distractions can make you do so unintentionally.

It may seem difficult at first, but just as you formed the habit of multitasking, you can re-form the habit of focus. It just takes practice. Start by reading a book cover to cover. Less than 2% of Americans do that once per year.

-- Jeff Stibel

Continue reading here...

Appetite

Grandma Ruth would stand there in the kitchen and say it gravelly, her hands on her hips, like that could keep her together and standing.

“Touch that and die.” 

Barbara Ruth Morton, she knew pastry and pecan pies and turkey with stuffing and she knew that there is a consuming of sweet things that ruins your appetite for the main thing. I can still taste her glazed hams with scalloped potatoes.  The bent woman might have had a one room school house education, but she knew if she could keep us from some things, she could give us an appetite for the real thing.

Ruin your appetite with stuff and you have no appetite for Christ.

-- Ann Voskamp, North American Lent: When You Want to have an Appetite for More of God

Detox Cleanse - Day-3

It takes a kind of mental will to persist towards something.

Day-3 of our detox cleanse; there are times during this process where I have felt great.  Today I feel awful. I want to just quit drinking the smoothies and eat something crunchy, meaty, anything really...and lots of it.  But, I suspect this is a trained response...an impulse I have learned.  I tell myself, "this is only 3 days of your life...you can handle it.  And, after all, you're not starving!"

Today, I can tell myself at each moment something I believe, like "you can do this...it is only 24 more hours". I have told myself similar things at times when I don't feel like I can finish a run, "you have done this a thousand times before...you can do it again now" or "it is only 6 more minutes and then all this pain will be gone".

Mental will is a kind of trust in something.  I trust that the outcome I desire will happen, despite how I feel.  Most of the arguments that challenge my will seem designed to attack either the validity of my belief or the likelihood that something will happen, which seems to borrow quite selectively from the past -- remembering times when I failed to continue or persist at something.  To put it differently, the future seeks to influence the present.  But, I really only have the current moment...to act, to decide, to believe something.  I can learn to trust that today's actions, the decisions of this moment, will impact the future more than the possibility of the future not coming true (or coming true, if that's what I'm afraid of).

It all comes down to trusting...at this particular moment.  ...whether that be something being over in 24 hours or that God is in control and will provide for me whatever I truly need in the future.  All I have is the choice to trust, in this moment.

Drowning in Calories

I would like to suggest - as I have other times, in other places, including most recently the peer-reviewed journal where I serve as editor-in-chief – that obesity may be likened to drowning.

Before making that case, let’s pause long enough to consider the implications for personal responsibility. If we are going into the water, it makes sense that we first know how to swim. It makes sense that a parent on the beach would watch their own child with great vigilance. It makes sense that families would keep watch over their backyard pools. And it makes sense that we would put on life preservers while white-water rafting. So far, this sounds like a pretty hefty dose of personal responsibility.

It also makes sense that we don’t run advertisements at the beach encouraging swimmers to try their luck with the most dangerous riptides. It makes sense that we don't goad our neighbors’ children into the deep end of a pool before making sure they can swim. It makes sense that the body politic and culture don’t conspire to make people drown.

Now to my principal argument: obesity is just like drowning. We have been told by Michael Moss, and others before him, that our food supply is willfully manipulated by smart and highly trained people to maximize the eating we all do, the calories it takes to feel full, and-of course- the money we spend along the way. As a species, we have no native defenses against caloric excess in the first place, never having needed them before. Couple that with a food supply engineered to ensure that we “can’t eat just one,” and we all are primed to drown in calories.

But nothing is wrong with a body that drowns other than staying underwater too long; normal, healthy human beings drown if they stay under water too long. Normal, healthy human beings get fat if they stay in our obesigenic culture too long, too. As we export our diet and lifestyle around the world, we see just how universal this vulnerability is.  

...continue reading here.

-- David L. Katz, MD, MPH

Detox Cleanse

...speaking of appetite; Tami, Kenz, and I are doing Dr. OZ's 3-day detox cleanse.  We're only on day-1 and still laughing about how we could eat everything in sight - crunchy, salty, sweet...everything.

Will we still be laughing tomorrow?

True Peace

B1G Tourney 2014- LETS GO BLUE!!

Medical Intervention

One study out of Southern Methodist University found that the effects of physical activity on mild to moderate depression were so powerful that the study's author, Jasper Smits, wrote a guidebook urging mental health professionals to actually prescribe exercise as a medical intervention. There are also studies showing how regular physical activity increases cognitive function and brain connectivity. And, conversely, we also know how bad for us a lack of physical activity can be. According to an American Cancer Society study, people with a sitting job are more likely to develop cardiovascular disease than those with standing jobs. This is not a new discovery. A 1950s study of people in similar lines of work showed that London bus drivers had a higher incidence of death from cardiovascular disease than bus conductors, and that government clerks had a higher incidence than postal workers.  Read more here....

-- Arianna Huffington

Endless

Love is an act of endless forgiveness.

-- Jean Vanier

Seek Forgiveness

Life has taught me to forgive much, but to seek forgiveness still more.

-- Otto Von Bismarck

Tenacity

"You're not the first one to start again
...
There is something to be said for tenacity"

-- OtR, "The Laugh of Recognition", from The Long Surrender

Q&A: Disciplined Pursuit of Less

Q&A:

 

Q: What prevents capable / driven people from breaking through to the next level?

A: Success

Success becomes a catalyst for failure...
...because success often leads to the undisciplined pursuit of more.

By focusing on a few things that are really essential, we are actually able to make a more valuable contribution. When people really get the chance to think, they can quite easily discern between what is essential and what isn't.

The problem is that we don't have the space to take the time to discern, to think. In a world where we have so much information, we need more time to think, to process, to see the bigger picture.

Have Our Being

In Him we live and move and have our being.

-- Acts 17:28

Over The Rhine - Tonight in South Bend

"Love: let it be not just a feeling, but the broken beauty of what we choose to do."

...songs have a way of nudging us toward the people we want to be.

-- Linford Detweiler, OtR

...must say, my hopes are pretty high for some deep resonance tonight. I want it. I need it.

Improved Cognitive Function

Research shows naps lead to improvement in cognitive function, creative thinking, and memory performance. In particular, napping benefits the learning process by helping us take in and retain information better.

The improved learning process comes from naps actually helping our brain to solidify memories. According to Max Read, "Research indicates that when memory is first recorded in the brain--in the hippocampus, to be specific--it's still 'fragile' and easily forgotten, especially if the brain is asked to memorize more things. Napping, it seems, pushes memories to the neocortex, the brain's 'more permanent storage,' preventing them from being 'overwritten.'"

One study into memory found that participants did remarkably better on a test following a nap than those who didn't sleep at all.

-- Belle Beth Cooper, 5 Scientifically Proven Ways to Work Smarter, Not Harder

Each Day

Each day provides with us with at least 2 opportunities; a gift to receive and a gift to give.

This thought emerged recently while I was running outside.  I was surrounded by a most brilliant sunshine and a blanket of impeccably white snow.  Blinding.  Breath-taking.  I could taste the beauty.  Gratitude swelled within me, at the opportunity to be there to receive this gift.  I wanted to share it ... not only to tell about it, but to show it to someone else.  The latter followed the former, as it so often does in many areas of life.

We can so often give out of what we have been given.

Adjusts The Sails

The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.

-- William Arthur Ward

Risk & The Brain

To function effectively the brain needs to prioritize information so it can make decisions about what it needs to focus on at any given time. The human brain is designed to pay conscious attention to four key areas and they are organised in order of priority:

1. Risk
2. Important
3. Pleasurable
4. Engaging

The conscious brain will pay immediate attention if something is a Risk or dangerous, this overrides everything and prioritizes the actions of the person concerned (Risk being 3 times more powerful than the benefits).

-- Sue Barrett

10,000 Ways

I have not failed. I have just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.

-- Thomas Edison

I am particularly interested these days in how things like persistence work in us as human-beings, particularly from a neurological perspective, and it's implications for us behaviorally, emotionally, and spiritually.

In The Dark

God has wisely kept us in the dark concerning future events and reserved for himself the knowledge of them, that he may train us up in a dependence upon himself and a continued readiness for every event.

-- Matthew Henry

Henry captures what has surely been true of my experience ... that there has been great purpose, utility even, in keeping me unaware of certain things, even the future, for a better-timed revealing of them.  Awareness is a healthy thing, but it can also be a hidden (and, sometimes, not so hidden) implementation-bid for control in life.  Leaving us to plummet the depths of our darkest fears seems to create opportunity for illumination.  And, the illumination is, among other things, a right-placed, right-sized dependence on the mercies and wonders of God.

The Indiana woods this morning are basted in another fresh layer of one of nature's more beautiful blankets -- pure white and more soft than really could even be imagined.  Our dog loved it almost as much as me, hardly able to roll in enough of it.

The northern sides of nearly every tree were home to the most delicate accumulations.  I can hardly imagine a design more beautiful, more glorious, more aimed at the love of our Creator for all things beautiful and harmonious.  I know there have been times when I couldn't see it, being pre-occupied with something more desperately needed for myself (or so it seemed).  But, with His graces so pervasive within me, today is another day that I can marvel at all this extravagant beauty.

I am dependent.  I am being given knowledge as it is needed.  The joy of it makes me full of anticipation of what yet is to be revealed, especially when this current darkness seems already so bright.

How Multi-tasking Can Kill Your Relationships

They call it "multi-tasking".  I call it annoying.  When I read about the merits of efficiency and the need to get more things done at once, it is always written from the perspective of the person doing multiple things at the same time.  I have never seen this modern habit described from the point of view of the person interacting with a multi-tasker.

When I walk into a colleague’s office and he is talking to me while simultaneously reading and responding to emails while his eyes dart to his iPhone’s text message alerts . . . I am not impressed with the ability to do several things at once.  Honestly, I get frustrated because I do not believe he is listening to me.  Over time this pattern has grated on me to the point I try to schedule our meetings in a conference room in an effort to disconnect his work station from our conversation.

...

Good things occur when I give God all 5 of my senses. 

-- John Richmond

How did we get from the former thoughts to the latter?  ...Continue Reading

Checking Their Phone

Emotional Commitment

Inspiration begins with emotional commitment.

You are using Emotional Intelligence if you fulfill three simple rules:

- Be in touch with your own feelings
- Be in touch with others’ feelings.
- Manage in a way that is never threatening, but is inspired and energizing.

In order to bond effectively with others, you must be emotionally free yourself. To be emotional free means, first of all, to be free of guilt, resentment, grievances, anger, and aggression. You aren’t asked to be perfect, only to be clear about your own underlying feelings. We all have negative emotions, but a leader deals with them effectively, for the good of the group. He or she doesn’t give mixed signals or indulge in outbursts and moods. Only in clarity can you trust yourself emotionally and have others trust you.  ...continue here.

-- Deepak Chopra

UM vs PU

...had the pleasure of being at this game...wow!  What a finish!

Communication

Communication is connection and inspiration.

-- Gary Burnison

Alone or Together

Prayer - A Healing Water

Prayer is as a healing water which causes the roots of our good desires to send forth fresh shoots, which washes away the soul's imperfections, and allays the thirst of passion.

-- St. Francis de Sales

28

To me, this song is a beautiful version of this piece by Ann Voskamp, which pretty much captures what I feel about today...our 28th wedding anniversary:

ALL OVER OHIO

Well the rain it has been falling
Like it wants to drown us all
And the trees are gently swaying
Like they’re thinkin’ ‘bout the fall
I still get shivers when I hear
You singin’ down the hall
I’m gonna kiss you all over Ohio

And the starlings they were flying
Earlier today
Doing their maneuvers
Clouds of feathers on display
Makes me wanna kneel in prayer but
I’ve forgotten what to say
I’ll just name all the birds in Ohio

Now the reason I am writing
Is to tell you ‘bout the flood
Ahh, the river is so beautiful
But it leaves a load of mud
All I have now are these dirty songs
I guess they’re in my blood
They make me wander so far from Ohio

(Yeah) It’s a silly undertaking
To fly halfway ‘round the earth
With an imaginary womb of songs
Intent on giving birth
I gave all that I had to give
I’m not sure what it’s worth
Scatter the ashes right here in Ohio

[Chorus]
All I wanna be is a thousand black birds
Bursting from a tree into the blue
Love – let it be not just a feeling
But the broken beauty
Of what we choose to do

And the halleujah chorus
Used to make my Daddy cry
I still wonder ‘bout the ruckus
Angels make up there on high
In the meanwhile there are measures
We can take to get us by
Lay me down next to you in Ohio

But my expectations stand still
Like beggars at the door
I’m flat broke from the dues
I’ve paid them all before
Gonna let the Cuyahoga
Wash me up on burning shores
Shipwrecked with you in Ohio
[Chorus]

I have seen the slow corruption
Of the best ideas of Christ
In the pulpits of our nation
Gospel turned into white lies
If you preach a subtle hatred -
The bible as your alibi
Goddam you right here in Ohio

But my shameless hallucination:
He’s still knockin’ at my door
And I know how this one’s gonna end
He’s gotten in before
I’ve run as fast as I can run
I’ve had to ask, What for?
He haunts me all over Ohio
[Chorus]

Well the rain it has been falling
Like it wants to drown us all
And the trees are gently swaying
Like they’re thinkin’ ‘bout the fall
I still get shivers when I hear
You singin’ down the hall
I’m gonna kiss you all over Ohio

-- OtR, from Meet Me At the Edge of the World

'In love' at the beginning; now more in 'love' (the real kind) than ever before . . . living through this broken life . . . together.  So grateful for Tami, my wife of beauty now of 28 years.

My Beautiful Woman

Must see (helps to watch at a size you can read the sub-titles):



I love the line: "I would rather them talk about me, than talk about June."

Time Bomb

Consumerism is a ticking time bomb; "work hard and play hard" leads to exhaustion and eventual physical debility. "Looking out for number one" deadens the soul.

-- Deepak Chopra

I like a lot of what this guy says; in part, because he identifies many things that seem very true to me about internal health...from a different tradition of understanding than I experience.

Taking Things Apart

Knowledge comes by taking things apart: analysis. But wisdom comes by putting things together.

-- John A. Morrison

Don't Want to Come to Work

People don’t want to come to work if they don’t know what they’re working towards, or if they can sense that their leaders don’t either. If you can no longer express your organization’s vision in a simple, compelling way, you’ve gotten off track. That means it’s time to refocus – not just the vision, but the organization itself.

-- Joel Peterson

There is something pretty real and practical about this observation. It seems to apply to almost any relationship.

Useless

There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all.

-- Peter Drucker

CT: Symbolic Hedge

Sociologist Philip Rieff and philosopher Allan Bloom both described a 'low symbolic hedge'.  I encountered this idea in The Shattered Lantern, a book by Catholic writer Ronald Rolheiser. If many Westerners have trouble perceiving God's presence in daily life, then perhaps, says Rolheiser, the problem is that our culture lacks potent symbols.€

The ability to use symbols distinguishes humans from other animals. Consider eating. All animals use food for sustenance and pleasure. But humans can employ candlelight, china, toasts, and blessings to imbue a meal with significance. Through symbols, eating can embody romance, friendship, honor, or celebration.

I must confess: I usually have neither the time nor the inclination to bother with such symbols. When, for instance, I eat on the run, my symbolic hedge is low; food is just fuel, and the day is just a succession of hours to manage or endure.

But Rolheiser warns that a low symbolic hedge drains the meaning out of experience. To illustrate, he imagines a middle-aged man beset by chronic back pain.

What does this pain mean? It can mean that he has arthritis, a medical symbol; or it can mean he is undergoing some midlife crisis, a psychological symbol; or it can mean that he is undergoing the paschal mystery, that this is his cross, a religious symbol. Or it might mean all three. The symbols with which we enter and interpret our experience can be low (suffering arthritis) or high (being part of the paschal mystery!).

God's apparent absence in ordinary experience is intimately connected to the diminished height of our symbolic hedge.

The Shattered Lantern reminded me that sensing God's presence is not the same thing as faith. God is near whether we feel him or not. "Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed," Jesus declares (John 20:29). Saint John of the Cross famously wrote of the "dark night of the soul,"€ claiming that sometimes God withdraws his presence.

-- Carolyn Arends

Read the rest here....

Us vs Them

I am intrigued by Dr. Katz.  I read him mostly because of his insight on health and the variety of misconceptions he debunks about current fads and remedies, especially as it relates to diet and obesity.  He obviously is talented and a thoughtful thinker even outside his familiar domain of medicine, as is displayed in his article referenced below:

Our literature -- even our greatest literature -- seems to sanctify the insoluble problem. It suggests to us that we live in a world of either / or, good and evil, us and them. In such a world, our heroes must fight, all too often to the death, with those whose allegiances or ideologies oppose our own. The adversaries of our heroes are, in turn, the heroes of those whose allegiances, ideologies, and aspirations they represent. And so it is that a cultural fixation on the pertinacious impasse, immune to reconciliations, blind to common ground, vulnerable only to arguments punctuated with the points of projectiles and edges of a blade has given us the predictable: “more heroes dead than heroic ways to die.”*

The origins of this dualistic view of reality likely extend to scripture, which in most of its prevailing variations gives us a world of good in eternal conflict with evil. But of course any human being with the vaguest insights about being human knows that for the most part none of us is purely evil, and certainly none of us is purely good. The best of us have bad days, bad impulses, and “evil” inclinations. The worst of us may be capable of love and loyalty. Much is made about the color of our epidermis, which says nothing about who we are. Our character, which says everything about who we are, inevitably comes in shades of gray.

And yet, we propagate the simple expediency of good versus evil, us versus them.

-- David L. Katz, MD, MPH

Seems both sad and true...continue reading.

Who Means the Most to Us?

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.

-- Henri Nouwen

How You Made Them Feel

I have learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

-- Maya Angelou

Out of Reach

Nothing set a person so much out of the devil's reach as humility.

-- Jonathan Edwards

How the Secret of the Snake Changed My Life Forever

*Photo Credit: Oleh Slobodeniuk, Creative Commons

More people are bitten trying to let go of snakes than when they grab them.

Easy to grab, hard to let go.

-- John Ortberg

Many years ago I struggled with some pretty severe sinful patterns in my life. Some would call them addictions, and if I’m being honest, they were. These weren’t your run-of-the-mill sinful patterns. They were the kind that destroy lives and break up marriages.

Which, for me, they did both.

In the darkest hours of these struggles, I found depression and a desire to end my life. At the worst point, I truly believed there would be no way out except to die.

This is the power of addiction, and sin is, among other things, addictive.  John went on to explain, this is true of everything that can destroy human character: deceit, bitterness, pornography, greed, debt, and workaholism. These sins are serpents that will quickly weaken the human spirit.

My awareness of the secret of the snake has been tremendously helpful. When I feel the urge to do something I know will be dishonoring to God, I envision myself holding onto a cobra and trying to let go. I pray and ask Him to help give me the strength not to pick it up in the first place.

My fear of getting bit is sometimes more powerful than the pleasure I think I’ll get by trying to grab the snake. As Mark Twain once said, “It is easier to stay out than to get out.”

-- Brian Gardner

Continue reading this helpful article about the power of addiction by clicking the 'Secret of the Snake' link above.

Humility and Will

Great leaders display a paradoxical combination of personal humility and professional will, channeling their energy, drive, creativity, and discipline into something larger and more enduring than themselves.

-- Jim Collins

CT: Why Confess Sins in Worship?

Corporate confession is a time to air it all out and reflect on our regrettable tendency to harm one another. It is a great equalizer, reminding us that we are all guilty of sinful actions and omissions, and that we all need forgiveness.

I believe that saying the words — having them move through our breath and on our lips — has meaning in itself. Even if we don't pay close attention as we speak, the words become real for us. Our bodies will remember them. Later in the week, a phrase from that confession might come to mind when we most need it.

Much of worship works in this subliminal way. It engages our sensibilities in a way we do not fully understand. A line from a hymn, a passage from Scripture, or a sermon may seem to pass over us. Even if we feel an emotional tug, the moment passes. A connection has been made, however, and its meaning can become clearer over time.

-- Kathleen Norris

Continue here....

When You Are Stronger

When you are stronger, you can do more.

I have found this to be true over and over again.  I have seen it in others; why do they seem to be able to do (or be) so much?  I have seen it in myself; recognizing how weak I can be and the tiredness that swims like a remora around that weakness...as well how much more capacity develops, how much more energy develops when I commit myself to working, growing, discipline, and gaining strength.  This is certainly observable in athletic performances we see in the Olympics.  These people can quite simply just do a lot more than I ever did and, while talent is certainly involved, most of it comes down to the fact that they worked a lot harder at something than I ever did (a lot harder).  And, this made them stronger and gave them greater capacity.

I don't think this is limited to the physical realm either, as I have observed similar realities in others and in myself mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.  When you are stronger, you can simply do more.

And here's the really good news:

When you do more, you learn more.  When you learn more, you become more.  When you become more, others want to do the same.

Doing Instead of Watching

Anyone can share their opinions about movies or TV or even (I'll grudgingly admit) books. That's why opinions are quickly forgotten -- what you say isn't particularly interesting. What you do definitely is.

So spend your time doing instead of watching. Cool things will happen. 

-- Jeff Haden

Put this and yesterday's post together? Sounds like a good process to me.

Eating and Drinking

We all need to eat and drink to stay alive. But having a meal is more than eating and drinking. It is celebrating the gifts of life we share. A meal together is one of the most intimate and sacred human events. Around the table we become vulnerable, filling one another's plates and cups and encouraging one another to eat and drink. Much more happens at a meal than satisfying hunger and quenching thirst. Around the table we become family, friends, community, yes, a body.

That is why it is so important to "set" the table. Flowers, candles, colorful napkins all help us to say to one another, "This is a very special time for us, let's enjoy it!"

-- Henri Nouwen

Say It

Sometimes you don’t know what you want to say until you try to say it.

-- Bruce Kasanoff

Being Both Large and Small

Being both large and small are important, I believe even inextricably bound. You can’t be a leader without having a vision that’s rooted in something big and motivational, but bordered by detail and hard work.

A strong leader, however, likes to hear voices other than their own. They listen, whether they are walking the halls or wandering the internet. They listen to seasoned veterans, but also to people just starting in the business. They answer every email and they find the time to communicate face-to-face. That’s how they learn.

-- David Sable

...and what a wonderful snow today to remind us of what is both large and small!

Need

It is our need that knits (binds?) us together.

Healing

It is hard to wait for healing.

...especially in a society where there are so many remedies for a quick fix or speeding up the process.  I wonder is there is a purpose in the time it takes to heal; a reason that we have to wait for it.

Pure Will

The full acting out of the self's surrender to God therefore demands pain: this action, to be perfect, must be done from the pure will to obey, in the absence, or in the teeth, of inclination.

-- C.S. Lewis

CT: How I Beat Back the Darkness after Rape

It's psychologically easier to bear false guilt than to bear powerless vulnerability. As long as you are responsible, you are in control.

-- Halee Gray Scott

Prompted by a recent episode of 'Downton Abbey', this quote from a helpful Christianity Today article about rape grabbed my attention.

It seems to me this statement is probably true in many of the ways we tend to think about different areas of our lives.

Forget to Live

It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.

-- Albus Dumbledore

Great Opportunity

The lure of the distant and the difficult is deceptive. The great opportunity is where you are.

-- John Burroughs

Something to Lose

Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose.

-- Steve Jobs

Frigid, We Cling

On these frigid days and nights, we cling to each other's bodies, if not for the warmth we seek for our bones, then for the comfort we seek for our souls.

After nights like last night, ending at 18 degrees below zero this morning, there's been good reason to cling.

Young Men

Young men are fitter to invent than to judge; fitter for execution than for counsel; and fitter for new projects than for settled business.

-- Francis Bacon

Breathless Expectation

Naturally, we are inclined to be so mathematical and calculating that we look upon uncertainty as a bad thing. Certainty is the mark of the common-sense life; gracious uncertainty is the mark of the spiritual life. To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways, we do not know what a day may bring forth. This is generally said with a sigh of sadness; it should rather be an expression of breathless expectation.

-- Oswald Chambers

...like an exorbitant snow that we awake to this morning!

Robert Downey Jr & Sting

Wow! Good vocals and guitar...didn't know Downey had it in him!

Humanity First

Pain often begs for your humanity first...and then often for God.

Holacracy

Only the respect of the led creates a leader.

-- Ricardo Semler

I have not read the book, Maverick, but based on this description, it is now on my list. It is an autobiography by Ricardo Semler. Here is some of how he used the concepts of holacracy at his company, Semco:

1. Treat workers like adults: Run companies on trust, rather than producing and enforcing an encyclopedia of rules. Empower employees to make decisions, and cultivate a culture of forgiveness rather than permission.
2. Share information: Share all corporate information with employees, from salaries to strategies and productivity statistics to profit margins. This transparency is a corollary of treating workers like adults.
3. Make managers accountable to their subordinates: Give the power to hire and fire managers to the employees who will live with the consequences.

Read the rest here....

Desire To Be Certain

The problem is that the overwhelming desire to be certain can eclipse the need to grow or be different, and it can limit our potential.

-- Jennifer Wilson

No Habit

No habit has any real hold on you other than the hold you have on it.

-- Gardner Hunting

7 Crippling Parenting Behaviors That Keep Children From Growing Into Leaders

7 Crippling Parenting Behaviors:

1. We don’t let our children experience risk
2. We rescue too quickly
3. We rave too easily
4. We let guilt get in the way of leading well
5. We don’t share our past mistakes
6. We mistake intelligence, giftedness and influence for maturity
7. We don’t practice what we preach

Here are some snippet-explanations for each item:

1. Kids need to fall a few times to learn it’s normal; teens likely need to break up with a boyfriend or girlfriend to appreciate the emotional maturity that lasting relationships require. If parents remove risk from children’s lives, we will likely experience high arrogance and low self-esteem in our growing leaders.

2. Sooner or later, kids get used to someone rescuing them: “If I fail or fall short, an adult will smooth things over and remove any consequences for my misconduct.” When in reality, this isn’t even remotely close to how the world works, and therefore it disables our kids from becoming competent adults.

3. Kids eventually observe that Mom and Dad are the only ones who think they’re awesome when no one else is saying it. They begin to doubt the objectivity of their parents; it feels good in the moment, but it’s not connected to reality. When we rave too easily and disregard poor behavior, children eventually learn to cheat, exaggerate and lie and to avoid difficult reality.

4. Be careful not to teach them a good grade is rewarded by a trip to the mall. If your relationship is based on material rewards, kids will experience neither intrinsic motivation nor unconditional love.

5. Kids must prepare to encounter slip-ups and face the consequences of their decisions. Share how you felt when you faced a similar experience, what drove your actions, and the resulting lessons learned. Because we’re not the only influence on our kids, we must be the best influence.

6. Just because giftedness is present in one aspect of a child’s life, don’t assume it pervades all areas. There is no magic “age of responsibility” or a proven guide as to when a child should be given specific freedoms, but a good rule of thumb is to observe other children the same age as yours.

7. As the leaders of our homes, we can start by only speaking honest words – white lies will surface and slowly erode character. Watch yourself in the little ethical choices that others might notice, because your kids will notice too. If you don’t cut corners, for example, they will know it’s not acceptable for them to either. Show your kids what it means to give selflessly and joyfully by volunteering for a service project or with a community group. Leave people and places better than you found them, and your kids will take note and do the same.

-- Tim Elmore

Why do we do this?  It is worth your while to read beyond these snippets and some of the answers here....

Enlarge

God is delighted to watch your soul enlarge.

-- Meister Eckhart

Whirled Beat - Doin' Laundry

...now that's doin' laundry!

True Acquisitions

Our true acquisitions lie only in our charities, we get only as we give.

-- William Simms

Trying To Be Happy

If only we'd stop trying to be happy we'd have a pretty good time.

-- Edith Wharton

Happiness vs Meaningfulness

While lives of meaningfulness and happiness overlap, they are distinctly different, according to Stanford research.

"Happiness was linked to being a taker rather than a giver, whereas meaningfulness went with being a giver rather than a taker," Aaker said.

A life of meaning is more deeply tied to a valued sense of self and one's purpose in the larger context of life and community.

One can find meaning in life and be unhappy at the same time.

-- Alex Banayan

Continue Reading...

Hard Work

 

There's one trait that always comes through among the successful:  hard work.

Let me list six simple things that help...:

1. Get up early: Hard workers get up early. They take time to themselves when it's quiet, they exercise before work, and they get organized before the flood of activity starts. Try getting up early and you'll be amazed what happens.
2. Focus on what matters. Each day: Research has shown that 41% of the things "busy people do" are not important, so we have to avoid or delegate things that may distract us from what we need to get done.  Ever year of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out)? Instead you should practice a little JOMO - Joy of Missing Out.
3. Pay attention to detail.
4. Do more listening, less talking: Not listening is an easy mistake to make - your mind is racing, you know what you want to say or do, and you're half-listening to the person or people around you. And when I was younger I was convinced that "doing my job" was the most important thing I could focus on.  It turns out that one of the best ways to "work hard" is to build great relationships with the people around you. Much research shows that personal relationships build trust, and from trust you develop the ability to work more efficiently and speedily. So by slowing down and listening you build the type of relationships vital to getting things done.
5. Develop yourself. Learn to use the tools around you: High performers are great learners. I got to many meetings as an analyst where someone mentions a book, model, company, or technology I've never heard of. I immediately write it down and make a note to look it up later. Over the years I've learned a tremendous amount about HR, technology, leadership, and business simply by following up on all the things I hear about.
6. Practice mental toughness: This means you should get comfortable with mistakes. You're going to blow it at times. You may lose the deal, give a poor speech, or handle a situation poorly. Pick yourself up and push ahead. That's life: everyone has been through such failures.

-- Josh Bersin

Click here for the rest....

Perfection

Perfection, in a Christian sense, means becoming mature enough to give ourselves to others.

-- Kathleen Norris

Patient

Love is...patient.  First of all, love is patient.

It is patient with me and that affords me the strength to be the same in myself and towards others.

Walter Mitty

I remember reading The Secret Life of Walter Mitty when I was in high school, or at least starting to.  I may have finished it, I don't remember now -- I don't remember the ending...perhaps a little frustrated with a guy who seemed to endlessly lose focus as well as somewhat intrigued with the notion of dreaming about the way things could be.  So, when the movie came out, I felt a twinge of something...that I should see it, at the very least to remind me of the book. Quite a story!

We often settle for a life that is safe and predictable, even as we often privately nurse small forms of our passions.   And occasionally life's circumstances twist us into an opportunity to find something we've been deeply longing for with the thinking that it can be found 'out there'.  We get up or are thrown out of our comfort zone, usually by something we are attracted to or really want, and discover that the 'out there' was really 'in here' -- I didn't have to go anywhere, it was in the back-pocket of my heart the whole time.  Though resigned on the front side, we are grateful beyond words for the aliveness we come out with.

Quite a story...of us!  So, jump!

Mentally Strong People: 13 Things They Avoid

Mentally Strong People: 13 Things They Avoid

1. Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves

4. Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control

5. Worry About Pleasing Others

8. Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over

11. Fear Alone Time

13. Expect Immediate Results

-- Amy Morin

Read the rest here....

Aim of Education

Character development is the great, if not the sole, aim of education.

-- William O'Shea

The more I reflect on this, the more true it seems (not that something can become more true...), especially when education seems to have become about so many other things. But, education, institutionalized or not, really is about the development of something. Certainly information (content) is involved. But, the development of habits (disciplines) related to the content of an education society seem among the more important things that occur (or need to). Knowledge is applied in living life. Character is what shapes the use (values) of that knowledge in living.

Fall Forward

Speaking of graces, what a wonderful read / contemplation by Ann Voskamp on a new year -- looking back and moving forward:

We are all going to botch it some days. We all sometimes get the notes wrong. But the song only goes wrong — when we keep thinking back to the wrong notes.

When a piece starts to fall apart — fall forward. Fall forward into the next bar. Moving forward is what makes music.

Read the rest...you'll be glad you did.

-- Ann Voskamp, A Holy Experience

Kindnesses Upon Graces

Many people don't seem to realize the many kindnesses on top of graces they have received...thinking somehow that what they have is something they should get because of their status, merits or efforts. Such people are not only sadly mistaken, but also not very attractive and often make others feel distanced and like they are unimportant or 'less than'.

I have felt this from others recently...I wonder how and where I do the same thing.

Snowflake

How fitting for one of the most frigid days in Indiana history:

A snowflake is one of God's most fragile creations,
but look what they can do when they stick together!

Man Does Not

The Holy Spirit convicts of sin, man does not.

-- Oswald Chambers

A Non-judgmental Presence

From 'A Henri Nouwen Society Blog':

To the degree that we accept that through Christ we ourselves have been reconciled with God we can be messengers of reconciliation for others. Essential to the work of reconciliation is a nonjudgmental presence. We are not sent to the world to judge, to condemn, to evaluate, to classify, or to label. When we walk around as if we have to make up our mind about people and tell them what is wrong with them and how they should change, we will only create more division. Jesus says it clearly: “Be compassionate just as your Father is compassionate. Do not judge; … do not condemn; … forgive” (Luke 6:36-37).

When we are free from the need to judge or condemn, we can become safe places for people to meet in vulnerability and take down the walls that separate them. Being deeply rooted in the love of God, we cannot help but invite people to love one another. When people realise that we have no hidden agendas or unspoken intentions, that we are not trying to gain any profit for ourselves, and that our only desire is for peace and reconciliation, they may find the inner freedom and courage to leave their guns at the door and enter into conversation with their enemies.

In a world that constantly asks us to make up our minds about other people, a nonjudgmental presence seems nearly impossible. But it is one of the most beautiful fruits of a deep spiritual life and will be easily recognized by those who long for reconciliation.

-- Henri Nouwen

Trick Shot Titus

Increase / Decrease

He must increase, I must decrease.

I can afford to feel smaller.  This is important because it is often the opposite out of which I live - I can't afford to feel smaller.  Even though I believe in the matching statement from the book of John above...somehow, it feels like there is something specific in this for me in 2014.  I don't know what this means, what it may look like, but it feels like something for me to both be aware of and to submit to....

2014 - What Kind of a Person?

After another year gone by, what lies ahead?

 

"Do things become clearer as you grow older or do you just get better at settling for smaller answers?", asks Julie in play called 'Oblivion'.

Growing older doesn't necessarily mean your life gets narrower. It provides countless opportunities to travel, learn, meet new people and expand your horizons.  The problem is...not every person views life as an opportunity to grow and broaden their experiences.

In fact, each of us faces a choice. The world sorts us into one of two types of people. As we head into 2014, I'd like to suggest that you ask yourself which kind of person you wish to be:

One who grows clearer with age: These are the people who embrace change, who recognize that it is inevitable. They don't get shocked when their children become adults, their job morphs into something new, or the character of their community starts to transform.

One who gets better at settling for smaller answers: These people tend to fear change. These unfortunates end up living in smaller and smaller boxes. They keep jettisoning the aspects of life that scare or unsettle them.

Finish reading here....

-- Bruce Kasanoff

2013 in Review

Here are some of my favorites from 2013:

January:
Dead or Dormant?
Choosing Strength
Aggressive Forgiveness
Letting Them Go
Hope for a New Year!

February:
I Asked
Blessed Are Those
The Need for Silence
Not A Reward

March:
New, Undiminishable Hope
Real Manhood and Steubenville
Once You're Motivated
Neuroplasticity and Habits
All Fortune

April:
Emptiness
What You Know vs What You Feel
the Table
Tragedy
Immodesty

May:
Will Himself Restore You
With Deep Affection for the Forest
Awakens
The Problem is Not the Internet - It's Me
Freedom Attracts

June:
Awareness
Law and Freedom
Rigor
Farther Away
Discernment in Solitude

July:
Even If You Fail
Poverty
Our Hands Are Too Full
Pictured Rocks
What I Really Need the Most

August:
Content Of Their Character
8 Things You Should Not Do Every Day
Meaningful Expression of Care
Through Each Other's Eyes
Seasons of Grieving

September:
The Only True Disability
Only He Who Listens Can Speak
The Difference
Killing Our Kids With Kindness
It Is Doubtful

October:
Conformity
Fine Word...and Doubt
Focus - Well You Don't Say
Talking A Good Game About Being Open-Minded
Comparison

November:
Best Football Play of All Time
Boring Romance
Being Honest - I Need Help
Sleep On It
Standardized Test Scores

December:
What We See
The Angels Sing
Dare Not Explain It Away
Nelson Mandela
The Bridge